We were talking about David and his fight with Goliath. It is a famous story in the Bible and certainly one of my favourite stories. Like many others, I have used it in sermons: “Slaying Your Giants”, “Stone Me!” and “How to Get A-Head in Life”. We use the principles of the story and apply them to our life. Great, and very practical.

A quick recap – David is facing Goliath, and his weapon of choice is 5 smooth stones for his sling. David runs at Goliath and shoots with a few small stones, targeted with precision to the head of Goliath. A message then goes from Goliath’s head to the rest of his body: you’re dead dude. Victory belongs to David and the army of God.

As we were talking about the story, we both went off on little tangents (as we often do when we chat), each getting a different angle on this legendary story. For me – it was looking at this idea of the 5 smooth stones (very specific) as his chosen weapon.

Concept: Having the courage to pick up the stones.

I wonder what that means to you?

I was asked recently, “What makes you happy?”

What a great question! if you haven’t read the book: 59 Seconds: Think a little, change a lot, then I highly recommend it. It is a great read. I particularly liked the chapter on happiness. Here are some of my notes from that chapter. You might want to try the journalling tips too – I really like those.

Happiness doesn’t just flow from success it actually causes it.

Is it possible to buy happiness?

• Ask most people what they need to be happy and in survey after survey “more money” is the top answer.
• Studies showed that those who have won the lottery on no more or less happy than those who haven’t.
• Studies show that when people can afford the necessities of life an increase in income does not result in a significantly happier life.
• Why is this the case? Part of the reason is that we all get used to what we have very quickly. Buying a new car provides a short-term feel-good boost but we quickly become accustomed to it and sink back to pre-purchased level of joy.

The scientific make-up of happiness.

• Research shows that about 50% of your overall sense of happiness is genetic
• 10% is due to general circumstances (educational level, income and whether you are married or single, etc).
• 40% is derived from your day to day behaviour, and the way in which you think about yourselves and others. This is the easiest one for you to change quickly.

The power of positive thinking?

Does the road to happiness really depend on people being able to simply push negative thoughts out there mind?

No. Research suggest that trying not to ink about something makes us focus on it more – so increasing misery. Try asking someone on a diet not to think about chocolate means they will eat more (fact).

Journal your way to happiness

People who have experienced a traumatic event have been encouraged to spend just a few minutes each day writing a diary type account of their deepest thoughts and feelings about it.

Participants experienced a remarkable boost in their psychological and physical well-being, including a reduction in health problems and an increase in self-esteem and happiness.

Writing encourages the creation of the storyline and a structure that helps people make sense of what’s happened and work towards a solution. Just talking about it can be unstructured and even chaotic

Journal outline

Maintain this journal for a week or two. If you feel the effects wearing off, simply repeat the exercise again.

• Monday: Thanksgiving.
  Think back over the past week and must be things which you are grateful for.
• Tuesday: terrific times.
  Think about one of the most wonderful experiences in your life will stop now spend a few moments writing down a description that experience and how you felt will stop to simply commit your thoughts to paper.
• Wednesday: future fantastic.
  Spend a few moments writing about your life in the future. Imagine that everything has gone as well as it possibly could. Be realistic, but imagine that you have worked hard and achieved or your goals. Imagine you have become the person you really want to be, and your personal and professional life feels like a dream come true.
• Thursday: dear…
  Think about sign your life is very important to you imagine you only have one opportunity to tell this person how important they are to you. Now write a short letter to this person, describing how much you care for them and the impact it had on your life.
• Friday: reviewing the situation.
  Think back over the past seven days and make a note of three things went really well for you.

What makes you happy?

I love the Rocky films, who doesn’t? My kids are just starting to get in to them, which is great as I get chance to watch them all again.

One of the clips that I love the most is this clip that I found on YouTube. It is a conversation Rocky has with his son who is doing nothing but complaining about life, and believes it to be everybody else’s fault (we’ve all been there). This is Rocky’s response to his son:

“Let me tell you something you already know. The world ain’t all sunshine and rainbows. It is a very mean and nasty place and I don’t care how tough you are, it will beat you to your knees and keep you there permanently if you let it. You, me, or nobody is gonna hit as hard as life. But it ain’t about how hard you hit; it’s about how hard you can get hit, and keep moving forward. How much you can take, and keep moving forward.

That’s how winning is done.

Now, if you know what you’re worth, then go out and get what you’re worth. But you gotta be willing to take the hits, and not pointing fingers saying you ain’t where you are because of him, or her, or anybody. Cowards do that and that ain’t you. You’re better than that!

I’m always gonna love you no matter what.No matter what happens. You’re my son, my blood. You’re the best thing in my life but until you start believing in yourself, you ain’t gonna have a life

In what way have you taken a hit recently? Did you get back up? Let us know how

For we are God’s masterpiece…(Ephesians 2:10)

According the dictionary – masterpiece can mean one’s greatest achievement. So we could write this – we are God’s greatest achievement.

I don’t know how you think or even feel about yourself. I also don’t know what you think or feel about God. What I do know is that there is something about you that that He has made extraordinary.

Imagine for a minute that you really are God’s greatest achievement

What would that mean? Does it mean that life should be great everyday, problem free? Should you be able to be in-charge, the boss?

Perhaps it means that you should treat yourself with respect, and enjoy who God made you. That unique you. The amazing you. That part of you that loves life and the challenges it brings. That flavour and expression of the divine that comes only from you.

Masterpieces are…

Masterpieces are admired by most, even despised and misunderstood by some – but they have a brilliance that should be shown. And the same with you. You have something extraordinary to show to the world… So let your light shine.

Masterpieces are not copies. They are originals. If you try and be like someone else – the best you’ll be is number 2. Let the real you live. Be vulnerable with the world and show us who you really are because you are astounding.

Oh, and remember – that person sat next you on the train talking loudly on the phone, the homeless on the street and the new prime minister are all a masterpiece too. Maybe they just need for you to help them uncover it, rather than judge their veneer.

You are God’s greatest achievement. His very best – out of all creation you rank the highest, by far, in what He has done. He is proud of you. So show us all what you look like.    

Cole states:

what about the unhealthy emotional and relational expectations portrayed in so much of our media? Is there really much of a difference in the hyperbolized sexual imagery of typical pornography and the hyperbolized momentary emotional high felt in a romance film or romantic comedy that sends us looking for a “love” that doesn’t exist?

Cole talks about he felt uneasy watching an episode of Glee that sparked all of this. I remember felling similar when watching ER (it caused me to stop watching it if I am honest).

Does the media generate in us a unhealthy view of what romance and love should look like?

The answer has to be an obvious “yes, of course it does“.

Somehow though – I feel that I am still able to judge between the media and real life. I must also say that in dealing with people the are having some kind of relationship issue (or when we do marriage prep) – not everyone can judge this difference and unhealthy expectations arise.

Has the church made this worse?

But I would like to take this one stage further and be a little controversial if I may: I just wonder if the church has made this worse or men, a lot worse by emasculating Jesus and using words like “lover” and “husband” to describe him?

We have presented (rightly or wrongly) a romantic notion of Christ coming in and sweeping you off your feet, and especially when life is at its lowest. This can be dangerous because wives can compare their husbands with Christ, the lover of their soul, and be sorely disappointed!

I remember reading Why Men Hate Going to Church. In there he relates a story about a man who called his pastor (Ed Cole) and said, “Pastor, my wife is having an affair with another man. His name is Jesus.”

So, as the church, are we compounding the effect and setting ourselves up for a big fall?

I still have a lot of questions over all of this, and I find the whole thing fascinating.

What about you? What are your thoughts?

“There’s never really a great way to say you’re sorry, but there are plenty of terrible ways.” And there are indeed, plenty of terrible ways. Some I have done, some I have been the recipient of.

Terrible ways to say you’re sorry

“One of the worst ways is the non-apology apology, which sounds like and apology but doesn’t really accept any blame. For example, “We’re sorry if this upset you”…whatever.”

The first thing we must do is just accept responsibility, period. Be a man. Own up and face up. No “ifs” nor “buts”.

The worst ever apology “We apologise for any inconvenience caused”

In ReWork they talk about the phrase “We apologise for any inconvenience this may have caused” and look at why it is bad:

1. “We” – never use group ownership, use “I”, don’t hide behind the group. Take responsibility.
2. You NEVER use the phrase “apologise” you always say – I am really, really sorry. Use language that is sincere and genuine. Not flowerery phrases.
3. “any inconvenience…” There is no understanding of what has happened to the person. Blanket apologies don’t work. Also – for most people, it is usually more than an inconvenience. As REWORK mentions, it is often a “crisis” for your customer. It can be a gut wrenching, soul destroying, heart-breaking event for someone.
4. “this MAY have caused…” again – this is not understanding individual cases. You are saying to people, “look – you might be hacked off, but most people aren’t. So you’re a bit of a freak – so just to show some good-will, we are offering you this non-apology apology.” Apologise to people that you have affected. Don’t apologise to those that you haven’t affected. Stop wavering.

10 Things to remember when saying “I’m Sorry”

1. How would you feel if the apology you are about to offer were offered to you?
2. Take responsibility! Stop being wishy-washy.
3. Don’t make conditional statements ie…”I’m sorry if we offended you”
4. Use “I” not “we”
5. Be genuine
6. Try hard to understand the affects that you have had on people – did you cause an inconvenience or did you cause a crisis? Did you upset them, or did you rip out their heart and stamp all over it?
7. Take action – don’t just say sorry and do nothing if there is something you can do put things right.
8. Don’t use crazy language – be you. Say it from the heart.
9. Don’t hide from what happened, ie. “I’m sorry but if you hadn’t have done this…I wouldn’t have done…” This is not about them. It is about you.
10. Be quick to apologise, “I’m sorry for being such a donkey 3 weeks ago” doesn’t work. Also be the first to apologise.

What are some of the best/worst apologies that you have heard/seen/done? What are your top tips for saying “I’m Sorry”?

I mentioned a while ago that I was reading a book called Church Marketing 101 by Richard L Reising – well, finally, I have sat down to write a review on the book. (In my last post on this – I asked why Americans insisted on using their middle initial all the time – Richard kindly wrote to me and told me – thanks Richard!)

Should you buy and read this book?

Absolutely. It is a great book for any Christian to read, and especially those who are in leadership of some kind. I loved it and got a lot out of it – you should too. I believe that people should read this so much, that I am giving away 10 copies of the book (see below on how to get one).

OK – that said, why?

Honestly, I am sat in Starbucks at the moment drinking a cup of tea (don’t like coffee) and using their WiFi. Right outside is a group of lovely and well meaning Christians with an amplifier playing “You are my rock in times of trouble”. Oh, and I am sat in Slough which has a large Asian community. People are walking past either ignoring or laughing and joking at the Christians as they pass by. No one is taking a tract and no one is stopping to talk to them, yet, at least.

They have obviously not read this book.

I don’t know what it is about Christians that means they have to take their brains out and put them in a little box when it comes to church related activities. We stop thinking. Yet these same Christians will complain when a double-glazing salesman knocks on their door or yet another phone company calls them at home. When it comes to God, however, this type of approach will be OK because “God will bless what we do”. We stop thinking and stop being creative. Do we, in reality, become lazy?

Don’t get me wrong – I am not against open-air evangelism. I love the passion and drive of people that will make them do these things to reach a suffering world. My hat is off to them. But, being an entrepreneur, I can’t help but think of these guys outside Starbucks with my business hat on. What is the return on investment here? If open air evangelism was a business – we would do it differently, very very differently. But it isn’t – it is a mission. And so it is easier to keep in the same patterns. Christians have the passion and call to do something. They just aren’t very good at figuring out how they should do something.

(This is a video created by the author which highlights his points brilliantly!)

The Bible and real, practical solutions (not flighty theology)

Reising does something that I love – he takes his experience and knowledge of corporate marketing and mixes that with Biblical wisdom and asks so really important and probing questions. It is right up my street, and is the same approach that I have with en-thuse and my business – how do you blend the Bible and business today to create something that is absolutely outstanding?

Defining Marketing

Richard defines marketing as the management of perception. “That’s it. Plain and simple. Marketing. Managing people’s perceptions towards the hopeful end that they will respond to Christ and His church.” He tells us that perception “is how people feel about a thing. It is how they see a thing in relationship to themselves and to other things from their mindshare.” I would simply say it is how people think and feel about something.

Developing a marketing strategy

Developing a marketing strategy then, is done the same way you develop any strategy: understand where you want to go (vision), thoroughly understand where you at and plan how to bridge the gap between the two. Critical to this then, is understanding how people perceive your church right now, and you can’t do this by making the same old assumptions that we have all been making for the last 30 years – the world, communication and technology have all changed way too much (even in the last 2 years) for this.

Reising tells us that “there are over 30 references in the New Testament to Jesus perceiving people’s perception and changing His ministry direction, re-communicating, or deciding to halt communications altogether. Wow, Jesus perceived (marketing word, remember?) their perception (thoughts) of Him, and He said or did specific things to change the way people perceived Him.”

Understanding the scale of the task

This has a massive scope for us then – because everything we do as church leaders will have an impact on people’s perception of us, and Reising asks a lot of great questions to help you with this. From the sermons, the powerpoint, the language you use to whether or not your toilets are effectively signed posted.

How to get a free copy of Church Marketing 101

I have thoroughly enjoyed this book, and it has really helped me. My advice for any church leader is to read this book it is worth it, so much so – that I will give away 10 copies of the book to anyone who wants to read it – just post a comment below or contact me on Twitter (@mattedmundson) and I’ll happily send a copy, anywhere in the world.

If you have read the book – why not post your comments below too.

How do you think the church should manage it’s perception?

I have a simple plan when dealing with fear that I use and lead others in when they are afraid. It asks: what are you DOING about your fear?

A brief summary

• D – Define your fears. Give your fears definition rather than leave them vague and unclear. Ask – what is it I am really afraid of?
• O – Outcomes. Think about the worst things that could happen if your fears come to pass. How likely is this? What are the best things that could happen if you deal with your fear? How likely is that to happen?
• I – Inspiration. Let God inspire you and breath faith into your spirit – it’s a great antidote to fear.
• N – Nerve. Dealing with fear means holding your nerve and exercising some courage. What are the right actions that you should take but that your fear is preventing your from taking? Resolve to do them. What actions could you take that will also help you overcome your fears?
• G – Guard. Keep up your guard. You are in a fight, and fear is your opponent, and it won’t go down without a fight.

I had an interesting conversation with my 8 year old son about fear the other night. He was afraid of going to school on a Monday and he couldn’t sleep because he was worrying about it so much. It reminded me of the time I was 8 years old – I was afraid of going to school too.

Step 1: Define it

Fear works well in the murky and the grey areas. It thrives in misunderstanding and confusion. It loves the dark where it can appear bigger and more powerful than it actually is.

So, to bring it into the light where we can deal with it – we have to define it. By doing this, you’ll be half way there as it is usually not as big a thing as you first thought.

What am I afraid of? Answer this question as clearly as you can. Keep drilling down until you get to the answer (your journal is great for helping you out on this).

My son was afraid of going to school. But that doesn’t really help matters. It is a big, undefined and generalised statement. We have to ask what it is about school that he is afraid of. I asked him a few questions and we started to realise that it wasn’t school he was afraid of – just the literacy part of the day (hence he didn’t like Mondays). And the reason he didn’t like literacy was that he didn’t think he was that good at spelling – so he was afraid of the spelling they did every Monday.

Understanding this changed his thinking about school (he actually liked going to school) – so his fear was now much more manageable.

Me? When I was 8 I was afraid of going to school because I was bullied. Bullying and fear are very similar – their bark is much worse than their bite.

Step 2: Outcomes

When you really begin to understand exactly what it is you are afraid of, you can begin to think about outcomes. And there are two that you should think about.

1. What are the worst things that could happen if what I fear comes to pass? How likely are they to happen?
2. What are the best things that could happen if I deal with this fear? How likely are they to happen?

These are really interesting questions to answer. For Josh – the worst thing that could happen was that he scored a Zero on his test, and the teacher told the class. He would then be ridiculed by his friends (who were much better at spelling). We then talked about how likely this was to happen. Josh began to see that at school he never scored that low on a test. We could get him some extra help as well, so he scores would improve. He agreed that scoring a zero was very unlikely to happen.

The best thing, of course, was that he scored well, and his teacher told the class and his friends wouldn’t ridicule him at all. This was much more likely to happen.

So, when we talked it through, he was scared of something that was unlikely to happen but it was more likely that what he wanted would happen, especially if we got him some extra help.

For me getting bullied, the worst thing that could happen was getting hit. I didn’t like the idea of pain. He also took my dinner money when he could. That wasn’t pleasant either. Getting hit was very unlikely (not that I knew this at the time). Getting money taken off me happened occasionally (although I expected it every day).

The best thing that could happen, if I stood up to him: freedom and feeling safe (as well as eating lunch everyday – which was highly motivating to me!). At the time this was unlikely to happen. Fortunately my mum knew how to level the playing field to make this likely to happen. I was sent off to Judo.

Step 3: Inspiration

It helps to get some inspiration…and if you are a Christian, the best source of that is God. His inspiration will give life to faith.

The great evangelist Billy Sunday once said, “Fear knocked at my door. Faith answered…and there was no one there.”

For me, when I was 8 – I didn’t have faith. It would have helped. Josh is much more emotionally aware and strong than I was at his age. We read the Bible and found some promises from God that we could choose to believe over his school work.

Faith is a choice – a choice of what to believe. Just as you have to define fear so you have to be as specific as you can with what to believe.

For Josh we could have talked about God being there and comforting us in our troubles. A good promise but we want something more specific – how about “whatever we put our hand to, prospers”? So when Josh studied and put in the extra lessons we talked about God blessing that and prospering him with his work. That is something specific we can believe.

Preachers call this the “Rhema” word – something that breathes life into you (inspires you!) when you see it.

It is also in this phase that the Holy Spirit may well reveal to you the root of your fear. Often times this may come as a passing thought – so journal about it when it happens. Don’t go digging – just be aware.

For me, dealing with fear in my own strength is not that exciting but when I face my fear, I can do it with God’s help. That makes much more sense.

Step 4: Nerve

Dealing with fear involves holding your nerve. It’s interesting to me how whenever an angel appears to someone on the Bible, he starts off by saying “fear not”. How many times does God tell us “not to be afraid”? In others words – hold your nerve!

According to Joyce Meyer (who is great by the way) this doesn’t mean not having the feeling of fear but rather not to let that feeling dominate your actions and stop you doing the right things.

So courage, then, apart from being one of my favourite words in the Bible is “the quality that enables people to meet danger without giving way to fear” (Chambers Dictionary)

So the next thing to write about in your journal are the actions that fear is preventing you from making and figure out how you could do them. What actions could you take that will also help you overcome your fears?

For Josh his fear would have stopped him going to school (mine too) if he didn’t have parents that made him go (me too). And the thing that we could do to help himself was have the extra lessons. And I learned Judo.

Once I learned Judo I had the courage to stand up to the bully. It didn’t happen the same day but it did happen in a few weeks. Funny thing when you stand up to bullies…you find out that they are cowards who use fear as a weapon. Take that away and they are just hot air. If you want to know, I ended up fighting my bully. I ended up winning too.

Step 5: Guard

Keep up your guard. In a boxing match, there is a balance of offensive strikes and defensive guard. Knowing when to hit and knowing when the hit is coming.

Fear is your opponent, so it is important that when you go on the offensive – they’ll be strikes coming back at you. Even when you think your opponent is beat, still keep up your guard.

When old thought patterns start to emerge again and try and choke out your new thought patterns – get your guard up. Don’t be surprised when the hits come. Keeping up your guard is remembering that you are in a fight, review where you have come from and remember where you want to get to:

• Keep your Definition clear.
• Think about Outcomes.
• Be continually Inspired.
• Hold your Nerve.
• Keep up your Guard.

Then you’ll be D-O-I-N-G something about your fear.

Keep reviewing in your journal where you are at and how it is going. Then write your own blog post with your story or post it below. Would love to hear how it went for you!

Consider Him

Hebrews 12:3 (New International Version)
Consider him who endured such opposition from sinful men, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart.

When we become weary is easy to become self-absorbed. To think only of our world. To think we’re the only ones affected. We start feel sorry for ourselves. I remember a time when I badly injured my right hand. I managed to put my hand through a table saw, and pretty much destroyed three of my fingers. I spent several days in hospital, had surgery and quite a lot of pain. My wife had just given birth to our second son, and all was not good in life. In hospital, I tried to remain optimistic but when I got home I began to suffer, not just physically but mentally. I couldn’t use my right hand and basic things like getting dressed and making toast were incredibly difficult to do. I couldn’t drive and I couldn’t work that well as I always used computers (typing was a problem). I am usually quite an active and independent guy – and it felt like a lot of this was taken away suddenly from me. I still had a lot of pain and whilst the surgeons with God’s help to the great job on repairing my fingers they still had to remove part of my right index finger (something that I found very hard to accept).

I began to feel sorry for myself. I began to question “why me?” Especially as I was doing a good deed, a favour, for a friend of mine. I was like this for a couple of days, and I didn’t seem to be getting better but worse. Then one night I turned on the TV and watched ER. At the time this was something I normally did, but this episode was to really challenge me. If you watch ER you may remember this episode, it was the one where Carter decided to go and work in Africa and the whole episode was about what he saw and what he had to learn to cope with in those camps. It challenge me because it made me think “who am I to complain, when compared to these kids in Africa, I have nothing to complain about everything to be thankful for?”

What I did is consider somebody other than me. And this very quickly took me out of feeling very sorry for myself into feeling very grateful. I stopped thinking about what I’d lost it started to rejoice in the things which had been saved.

And this is the essence of this verse. We are to consider him who ensured such opposition… because if we don’t would become very self-absorbed, very self-centred, very selfish, very inward and very weary. We are to consider him, Jesus, who went through so much for and on behalf of us and compare what we’re going through with what he went through. It puts what we are going through into much more sober terms and helps us focus. It stops that spiral of thinking which leads nowhere except to weariness. And it will become weary eventually lose heart. When you feel yourself becoming weary, take a pen, a piece of paper, and a few hours and just consider him and put your situation in comparison to that. This is not to underplay on what you are going through or how you’re feeling, it is just to put it in more realistic terms and to control negative thoughts and emotions from robbing your joy and strength any more than they have to.

Balance

I don’t know if you’ve ever watched the movie The Karate Kid? If you haven’t, then I suggest you rent it or buy it in your next opportunity. It is a great 80s film, one from my childhood, and one with so many life lessons contained in it.

If you have seen the film then you’ll remember the scene where Mr Miyagi and Daniel are talking about Balance:

Miyagi: What matter?
Daniel: I’m just scared. The tournament and everything.
Miyagi: You remember lesson about balance?
Daniel: Yeah.
Miyagi: Lesson not just karate only. Lesson for whole life. Whole life have a balance. Everything be better. Understand?

Miyagi teaches Daniel a great life lesson here. Balance is not just karate, that is for whole life. When your life has balance everything seems to work well. Before you panic though and think that I’m becoming too Zen and mystical there is a wonderful verse from Scripture:

Proverbs 25:16-17 (The Message)
When you’re given a box of candy, don’t gulp it all down; eat too much chocolate and you’ll make yourself sick; And when you find a friend, don’t outwear your welcome; show up at all hours and he’ll soon get fed up [become weary].

Balance is not just about increasing your “me” time. As this verse shows us, too much of a good thing can be out of balance.

I’ve just finished reading an interesting book called 59 Seconds: Think a little, change a lot, by Richard Wiseman in his book wise men looks at some of the myths of self-help and compares them to scientific research and study. In his chapter on happiness he looks at the subject of giving and I was fascinated by some study results he refers to. A researcher called Sonja Lyubomirsky arranged for a group of people to perform five non-financial acts of kindness each week to 6 weeks. These acts were to be simple things, such as writing a thank you note, giving blood or helping our friend. The participants were broken down into two groups: one group performed one of the acts each day was the other group carried out all five acts on the same day.

And the results of this test I find absolutely fascinating. The group who performed their kind acts each day showed a small increase in happiness. However the group who carried out all the acts of kindness on just one day each week increased their happiness by an incredible 40%.

When I read this I made a note in the book: I wonder if this is the same of those who do Christian acts of service? I see a lot of faithful servants in church who do a lot of the things that need doing. Day in and day out they give their time, effort and emotion to incredible acts of kindness. Add into that mix home group, Sunday service and prayer meetings it is easy to see how many people seem to spend every spare hour on church activities. And like the research group, their experience a small increase in happiness at the start. But weariness is coming. I wonder if life would be better if we were in a church five nights a week but rather one night a week. Would we, like the research group, feel happier and therefore be a lot less weary?

This is not an excuse for passivity, but rather focusing your passion and choosing a place where you can serve and give to that, be happy, be effective and be there for the long term.

Sometimes life is just out of balance and oftentimes I believe that weariness is a sign of this. If you’re weary, check your balance.

Serve

You may remember at the start of this study I talked about how our church was transitioning to clusters and how I saw this as an opportunity to take a step back and have some time out (“me” time). In the back of my mind I saw this is reasonable and could have given you a well reasoned, well articulated reason why. The Lord then began to speak to me through this study on weariness, and serving is where I ended up. At this point in my life I still don’t want to lead a cluster, and I wouldn’t know what type of cluster to lead. What I do know is that this is no reason to take a step back and disengage. So I decided to serve. My aim is to find someone whom I can serve, and to do that in a way that keeps me engaged, that maintains a happy church-life balance, that is effective and will benefit others.

Sure like many others in church, I have been growing weary. I see that now and I don’t want this to be a reason for me to take a back seat — that is not who I am, or God’s call on my life. So in the absence of knowing anything else, I know enough to begin to serve.

1. Wait on the Lord (we look at this in this post)
2. Consider Him
3. Balance
4. Serve

Wait on the Lord

Isaiah 40:28-31
Do you not know?
Have you not heard?
The LORD is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth.
He will not grow tired or weary, and his understanding no one can fathom.
He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak.
Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall;
but those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength.
They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.

Notice here that the Bible tells us that even youths get weary, so us slightly older folk have no chance of avoiding this.

So God has promised strength for weariness, His strength for our weariness – it’s not a bad swap, is it? How do we get to this place of exchange? By waiting on the Lord.

There is no earth shattering revelation here and the solution is deceptively simple. For me, weariness happens when I have not connected with God for a while and entered that place of exchange where He gives me strength for my weariness, righteousness for my sin, grace for my works, health for my sickness and riches for my poverty. I have to wait on the Lord – not passively, but by building my hope and my trust.

We live in an action orientated society, where there is a huge emphasis on doing. We have to-do lists coming out of our ears. We have the pressure of never-ending e-mail, post-it notes stuck everywhere, and lists clued to the fridge with magnets. This is a doing society. We have to feel like we are doing something. I don’t suppose we are not that different from Martha, she was also in doing mode. But often times that doing takes the place of listening and that is where waiting on the Lord comes in.

And waiting on the Lord is exactly what Mary was doing and if we are to stop being weary, it would help us to get back to that simple place of sitting at His feet and listening to what He has to say, and let those words refresh our soul, because without that connection we very quickly become weary. Society is determined to get us into a doing state and it is no wonder people become weary quite quickly. We are in this world but we are not of it, and therefore we can work by different set of rules and our rules state: seek first the Kingdom of God.

As I said, this is not earth shattering revelation. It is deceptively simple. As one person said, “the Bible is so simple, we’ve had to have help to misunderstand it”. But whilst it is deceptively simple often we find it incredibly hard to do, but as Stephen Covey says, “we must learn to put first things first”. The first things are: just simply connecting with the living God.

In different translations the word “wait” is translated “trust” or “hope”. One of the things that happens when we become weary is we start to become dejected, and we start to lose our view of the future, as we have already discussed. In other words, we start to lose our hope. We stop hoping and start concentrating on the here and now, and often think “when will things be different?” And one of the great things about connecting with God is that He always renews your sense of hope.

In Revelation 2: 3 Jesus is talking to the church and says, “And you have persevered and have patience, and have laboured for my names sake and have not become weary.” I want you to notice the link between patience and not being weary. In the New Testament, the word patience comes from the same word that hope comes from. Patience and hope are tools that God gives us to persevere, and not to become weary.

I mentioned in my previous post the Scripture from Matthew 9:36 which talks about how Jesus had compassion on the multitudes because they were weary. So when you get into that place of connecting with God hold in mind that at that point, God has compassion on you. And out of that place of trusting in Him, allow him to rebuild your hope and give you a different picture of the future.

So my advice is simple. If you are weary, schedule some immediate time-out. Get a pen and your journal, some worship music and connect with God. Do this daily and let the peace of God wash over you and rebuild your hope. Listen to Him. He will tell you what to change. Jesus told Martha that Mary had done that one thing which was needful. Do the same. Exchange your strength with Him, and then you will run and not get weary.

Notice that last part of the verse from Isaiah:

those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength.
They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.

What a tremendous promise this is for us!

It comes out of this idea of not doing things in our own strength, but learning to do things in His strength – this is renewing our strength. When I am weary, it brings me great hope to know that actually, God has a different idea in mind. When I am weary, I am tired, and things happen slowly – I don’t feel that I am that effective in what I am doing. But in that state, I can know that God has a plan for me to “run”, not just crawl around at a snails pace dejected. I can do what I am doing, in His strength, with great speed and efficiency – and not get tired. It is a supernatural energy that will keep me going.

So when I wait on the Lord, I rebuild my hope and I renew my strength – which all then allow me to get back out there and run!

Do you remember the story of David and Goliath? The whole Israelite army had sat there for 40 days and did nothing but became more and more fearful about the giant. David came, and he came from a place of using God’s strength rather than his own. He knew that God would give him this giant because David was the one who had a covenant with God. David wasn’t afraid – in fact the Bible tells us that he RAN at Goliath. He ran at him.

We can wait on God just enough and get by. But then we are not too dissimilar to the rest of the world. God’s plan is always more than get by. In whatever you call and walk is with Him – you can have a supernatural energy that allows you to get more done that the average person. His strength will allow you to destroy the giants that other people fear. We can operate on the opposite side of the spectrum of weariness. God doesn’t get weary the Bible tells us. He won’t get tired. We can use His strength, and it all comes from a place of waiting on Him.

So when you wait on the Lord, you can know that you will renew your strength, He will renew your hope – and then when you come out of that place, you won’t just have the strength to get by – but enough to run at what you do and not get weary. It sounds like a good deal to me…I just have to remember to get into that place of regular connection with Him. Life is not just about doing. It is also about being.

I’ll end this post with a quote that I will always remember from Bible School: Don’t get so busy doing the work of the Lord that you forget the Lord of the work.